New Friends

friendslogoI made a new friend. Do you know how hard that is to do as an adult? Seriously, when was the last time you made a new friend? Someone who was a complete stranger to you 24 hours ago that is now saying “Hey, we should do something together!” Don’t get me wrong, I have made loads of music friends and they are precious to me. But we get together for shows. Frankly, many of them live states, even countries away. I’m talking about a meet me at yoga and then go to lunch new friend. AND THAT’S JUST WHAT HAPPENED.

I went to a bar down the street that had a friend’s husband’s band playing. The friend never showed because she had vomiting children (such a legit excuse!) But that meant I was alone. A woman liked my freshly done, just-got-it-four-hours-ago tattoo and we started talking. We had some things in common, she took my number, and lo and behold, she texted me and asked if I wanted to join her at yoga on Saturday. I’m not super into yoga, but I am super into people reaching out to me, so I said yes. Turns out the studio had a sweet starter deal and I will be able to try as many classes as I’d like for the next 30 days for only $29! With it only being 5 minutes from my house, I think I will get my money’s worth. Afterward we went to lunch (sushi!!) and got to know each other. She even said “I hope we can be friends.” How cool is that?

Friends are important at all ages and stages of life.  It’s sad that it’s so hard to make new ones as life advances.  Many times, these are the days when things are changing and you need new kinds of people in your life for new kinds of things.  I hope this new friendship works out.


I bought a TV!


I haven’t had a TV in six years. Well, that’s not exactly true, there is a TV in my house, a huge analogue monstrosity that sits (and fills) a corner in my family room. But if you turn it on, very little comes through and a high whine is emitted that drives my sons crazy. So it doesn’t get turned on. A long time ago, before broadcast TV was digitally transmitted, I watched my TV. Through the air. Via an antenna (the antenna has long since blown out of alignment.) How about that? I was so far ahead of the “cord cutting” trend, that maybe I am even hip – I’m a “never-corder”. I have never had cable (or satellite or Direct TV…) When I lived in my parents’ home, they didn’t have it yet and ever since I have been on my own, I never ponied up for the expense. And yet I love watching TV. I always figured that with as much as I loved TV, I would watch it all the time if I had cable. So, since it would have been a stretch to afford it at many times of my life, it seemed a good idea to avoid it.

So how did I stop watching my TV in the family room in the first place? Over six years ago, my son’s anxiety was in high gear and I had to work very hard to help him manage it. All of a sudden, he could not be on a different floor of the house than an adult, ever. He would check several time before falling asleep to see if someone was there and even woke a few hours after he fell asleep to check again. Since I was the only parent at home at bedtime, I was forced to abandon the TV in the basement level family room. So I began watching things on my laptop. I started with Netflix, added Hulu, and finally Amazon Prime. I’ve been watching like that ever since.

About a month ago, I needed to change some things up, so I decided it was time to buy a TV. I ended up redoing my entire living room to accommodate the TV, and I love it. It’s now light and airy and just gorgeous! New rug, new curtains, repainted tables, new pillows, and a Craigslist find as a TV console table. My wonderful new smart TV came with Netflix, Amazon, and YouTube right on it. I quickly added ChromeCast to the mix and now everything I watch on my laptop can now be slapped up on my TV. I am giddy with excitement. And am watching a little too much TV!

Losing Weight. Again.

Seven years ago I lost a lot of weight. It was the weight that stuck around after I had my second child and no matter what I did, it refused to go anywhere. It made me miserable, but the likelihood was that it stuck around because I was miserable. In early 2009, I had a miraculous turnaround that brought “self” back to me along with music and a whole host of friends. The weight just melted off. I had no idea how or why. When people asked what I had done, all I could respond was “I got happy.” I even kept the weight off, rather easily. For years.

Then menopause kicked me in the face. I have had very few “female problems” throughout my life, and luckily menopause was not a whole lot different. But weight gain? That came thundering on. Honestly, when it started happening, I didn’t even know it was related to hormonal changes. I tried to ignore it. Terrible things were said during my marriage because of my weight and I was terrified of what could happen now. I felt like I tried to get it under control, but like so many years ago, nothing I did seemed to make any difference. For a year and a half I tried, failed, tried again, and failed yet again.

Then all of a sudden, it worked. Did I just get happy again? No. But looking back I can now see that I did do the same thing I did last time, I just didn’t know what I was doing last time. I am now confident that should I ever have a weight issue again, I DO KNOW what to do about it.

So what DID I do? I adopted a low carb high fat eating plan. This is not just a “diet” for me, it is definitely a change in lifestyle. Here’s the thing that is so surprising to me, this way of eating makes me so much less hungry. Same thing happened seven years ago too, that’s how I first recognized that I was probably unconsciously following a low carb diet back when I lost weight the first time. Since I also have several factors that increase my odds of developing diabetes, a long term change like this could literally save my life. I am not a low carb evangelist though. This worked FOR ME; worked really well in fact. And I do advocate trying it if you have weight or blood sugar issues since it may work for for you too. But I agree it’s not for everyone. Since I am now back to lifting weights too, not only am I back down to the weight I was, but I am also much more muscular. So overall, I think I am well ahead.

It’s so unlikely that I would be able to lose weight, and keep it off, not once, but twice at my age. That first time was luck, and honestly, I did get happy. This second time, while I happened to stumble upon the correct method, at least I am aware now. However, barring any future medical mishaps, I plan on maintaining this weight like I maintained it last time for many years to come.

The New Tattoo

Jimmy working on it
In context
Up close

Now come the posts. Probably a couple in quick succession. Partly because it’s new and I am interested and partly because I really need to know what the hell this is going to look like and figure out a decent layout!

Let’s start with today’s big news – I got my third tattoo!! I always knew I was going to get at least one more, having just two was unsettling. I hate even numbers. In fact, I will ended up with either 3, 5, 7, or 11 tattoos in my lifetime. But not nine – nine is not prime, and I can’t have that. My first tattoo was just three years ago and on my foot, which may be one of the most painful places to get one. My artist tried to wave me off, but that’s where I really wanted it. The second is on my ribs, also supposed to be very painful. When he mentioned that, I looked at him, smirked and pointed to my foot. So now it’s on to my forearm. Easy peasy.

It took a long while to decide what I really wanted. I knew where I wanted it, just not what. I’ve been gathering ideas for a good two years and now seemed like the right time to do it. The yin and yang symbol, whatever it means to you, means balance to me. Two sides of one whole, with a little of this in that and a little of that in this. Balance. Just as that first tattoo did then, and continues to now, remind me to live a full life, this one is going to remind me to keep my center and make sure the give and take is even. But I wasn’t interested in a standard yin and yang, I wanted something fancier, a little filigree-like. I took several of the ideas I had gathered to my artist and I was so happy to see that his design was more beautiful than the samples I had given him. I am happy to have this great piece on my arm.

Now for the itching!

What’s this all about?

This is the excerpt for your very first post.

Hello Orion….. I have said that potentially 3500 times now. It’s been a constant in my life for a long time. You see, I bought my house over 23 years ago and during the winter months, Orion sits right above my house greeting me as I walk in. I moved into this house alone because the man I was living with was 13 hours away at the federal law enforcement training center; I live in this house alone now because the subsequent marriage didn’t work out. I didn’t have kids then, I do now – but they will be off on their own soon enough. So many things have changed and altered. I have changed and become a different woman over the years. But still, Orion greets me when I arrive home.  The stars are good for that.

I always wondered why someone would write a blog, tell their stories to anyone who happened to click on their page. It seemed so random, so open, so vulnerable. I also firmly believed that no one would have any interest whatsoever in me. Maybe they don’t. But maybe I need to not care. I have spent a lot of time being closed off and not letting many people in because I think people don’t care about me.  But more on that in a later post.

I have recently lost weight again; had some success at the gym, too. I’d really like a place to be proud of that, with pictures. Facebook seems too braggy, but my own blog? That seems a-OK.

I make art. I love live music. I am getting my third tattoo tomorrow.

That’s a good enough start for now.